Way back when, British darling Keira Knightley expressed a desire to have a body like 'The Gossip' chanteuse Beth Ditto, calling her form both "sexy" and "amazing."
To be honest, I'm gobsmacked at the thought of someone experiencing even a fleeting want to clock in with an off-the-chart BMI (much less a want so pronounced that it might drive a person to make an on-the-record statement in regards thereto), especially when the individual doing the wanting has clearly and deliberately chosen an, oh I don't know, less indulgent path, but as my Mom would say, "Oh, Johanna, those Hollywood types -- they don't really think anything through."
I guess not.
Unfortunately for her but fortunately for the rest of us, Keira decided not to throw herself into a full-body Beth makeover in her new, very nude and very controversial Chanel Coco Mademoiselle advert.
Why so controversial? Well, you see the curvature of that sweet bit peeking out from underneath the bowler? Yeah, that's no so much Ms. Knightley as it is a result of Photoshop wizardry -- a trick of the trade with which this actress is well-versed, having been a victim of "add-ons" in both her King Arthur and Pirates of the Caribbean movie posters.
This time around, there were no high-powered producers and publicists making last-minute changes in an attempt to more effectively appeal to broad swaths of the "bigger is better" American population. Quite to the contrary, in fact, for it was Karl Lagerfeld, the creative force behind the House of Chanel (maybe not the fragrance line, but whatever), who has notoriously and consistently shrugged off and even railed against the concept of "too skinny." That being so, I've come to the conclusion that Keira's digitally enhanced rack was the result of that other desire she so publicly divulged in a TV interview two weeks after the Beth Ditto comments.
Good for you, Keira, but here's a hint -- you could get some real tits - ones that actually stay put after the photoshoot - if you actually put on a stone or two.
