Quote of the day: Angelina Jolie

"I could be dressed up in the sexiest outfit for a photo shoot, and by his behavior, he'll let me know that's nice, but it's nothing as sexy as when I'm reading books [and] educating myself. "

(Angelina Jolie in response to the question, "What does Brad find sexy?")

Okay, this is getting ridiculous.

Maybe this is a guy-to-girl attraction I don't quite understand, but in my experience, watching your lover "educate" herself - at least in the context Angie implies - is hardly what I would consider a woman's zenith of sexiness.

In fact, in my last relationship, the most I-think-I'm-going-to-put-my-clothes-back-on moments I can recall were those when J would slip in any one of the Volumes I-XII of his Ancient Rome CD-ROM box set into his laptop and every few minutes shout out things like, "I totally thought that was Pericles, not Thucydides, go figure! Hon, did you see this? Didn't you think it was Pericles, too?"

No I didn't see it, and no, I didn't think it was whomever-you-just-said, I would reply without really knowing about what he was asking. And I wouldn't know because I was too busy watching my ladybit wave a surrender flag and dividing my time equally between "America's Next Top Model" and "Super Obese: I Eat 33,000 Calories a Day."

Smarts are sexy, there's no doubt about that. Some might argue the sexiest part of a person's allure. Professors and senior analysts at think-tanks wouldn't be getting as much out-of-their-league ass as they do if this weren't the case. But the process through which people must go to get to the point where they're considered experts - comps, study groups, overnighters in the library fueled by Diet Red Bull and Cool Ranch Doritos - this, better known as "educating oneself," is hardly arousing. Tell me, when was the last time you walked by SAIS, saw a 130lb guy highlighting a Keohane book on neoliberalism and bandied with the idea of offering him "a hand" with his um, game theory? The answer is never, because it doesn't happen. But take that same guy, 15 years down the road giving a talk at Brookings on his own ideas on international cooperatives, and well, yeah, I'd pull a Rachel Weisz in The Constant Gardner and take him home post-lecture post-haste, too.

But back to Angie. I love her. I respect her. And if there was anyone in Hollywood with whom I would switch places in a heartbeat, after Katie Holmes, it would be her. That's why these past couple of pretentious statements she's made are so devastating to me. The last thing I want this temptress to turn into is a takes-herself-so-seriously-she-might-as-well-look-like-Kathy-Bates blowhard like Jennifer Connelly. Then again, there could be a double-standard going on here. Maybe I wouldn't find Angie's above statement so preposterous if she didn't look the way she does.

Call me superficial, but when I look at her in something like she's wearing above or in get-up like this, the last thing I'd want her to do to really get me in the mood is bring up Israeli airstrikes or pick up the latest issue of The Far Eastern Economic Review.