25 September 2007

My for-Fall checklist

Aside from the always soothing croon of Huey Lewis and the (usually) inner-dialogued "tighter ass, higher ass, tighter ass, higher ass..." chant, there is only one other distraction that can consistently convince me as I'm climbing at snail - no, glacial - pace the hill by American University's Katzen Arts Center that all this giving up of weekday night drinks and wearing of skinny jeans (just try fitting these in these without knuckle burns) is worth investing the inordinate amount of time, energy and joint deterioration training for a 26.2 mile race necessitates.

While some might imagine a bottle of fruit punch PowerAde, a back massage, a rainfall shower or a thorough towel-down from the man or woman of their choice, I'd have to say the best motivator in getting my weary body and depleted willpower through a rough running patch is the fantasy of having in my possession the nine items you'll find here below -- the items that make up my 'for-Fall checklist.'

Whatever gets the job done, right?

Remember, apart from the fragrance, pay more mind to the type of item, not the specific example I've chosen to represent that category.


1. Prim mid-weight coat
(something to take me comfortably through the 50s and 60s)
Brushstroke brocade coat by Nanette Lepore ($625 at saks.com)

2. Grey pencil skirt
(because I've gone far too many years without one)
Wool mélange back pleated skirt ($108 at anntaylor.com)

3. Preppy-printed opaque tights
(if you distract them with a schoolgirl print, they won't notice how short your wool mini is...)
Herringbone tights by Free People ($28 at freepeople.com)

4. Super structured necklines
(it's ultra-feminine necklines like this one that keep me from looking like a "Thai rent boy")
Horse print mini by Juliana Jabour ($1,277 at shopbop.com)

5. Ivory sweater dress
(I'm finally gonna show my Mom this messy girl can do white just fine, thank you very much)
Cashmere sweater dress by Karoo ($330 at pinkmascara.com)

6. Straight-legged jeans
(because I just don't feel comfortable back home with three inches of tight ankle bunching)
Capital E Swank straight leg jean by Levi’s ($158 at barneys.com)

7. Box clutch
(a wee bit fancier than an everyday clutch and much more difficult to find - perfect for starting off the holiday season stylishly)
Pleated leather box clutch by Erva ($325 at shopbop.com)

8. Wine-colored pump
(pairs extraordinarily well with grey, black and ivory -- essentially, the "rainbow" of my wardrobe)
Jocelyn Mary Jane by Calvin Klein ($104 at lorisdesignershoes.com)

9. New scent
(another Blue Mercury sample find -- subtle, oh so ladylike, and received a "Wow, that's the first perfume I've liked in a long time" on a recent date)

Millesime Imperial EDP Spray by Creed ($110 at neimanmarcus.com)


ataraxia said...

Fun list!

#5 reminds me how I haven't bought a real cashmere anything in quite awhile and I'm thinking this fall/winter might be it. Can I implore you to do a feature on "If I only bought one cashmere something this season, this is what it would be" -- just an idea...

kimberly McCollum said...

That jacket is fabulous!

Another thought to get you through your rough running patch: You're an inspiration to me not to skip my runs ( and to many others, I'm sure)!

laura_m said...

I have to admit, I went to Macy's after your first post with those CK Mary Janes and scooped up the last size 8 in the store. I get compliments on them every time I wear them out!

brown bear '02 said...

The Nanette coat is simply too cute for words. Too bad it's about $400 too expensive...

'frisco guy said...

That Huey Lewis video totally just made my day.

not impressed said...

Well isn't this Johanna lovefest so touching? Honestly, I don't know why or how this self-absorbed airhead could be remotely motivating in any way, running, fashion or otherwise. I find what I read on here about her life (which is most likely an inflation of the truth anyway) to be rather sad and empty. Clothes don't love you back, do they, Johanna?

C said...

Apparently bitter housewife is the new black.

Meokat said...

Clothes *so* love you back, jerkface

Anonymous No More said...

Dear not impressed @ 1:43 PM,

You are annoying and pathetic.

Your catty digs show how sad your life must be, hiding behind a pseudonym attacking someone you do not know. Is that how you build yourself up? That must make you feel all warm and fuzzy.

Go away.
Dear everyone else,

I know, I know first commandment of blogging is thou shall not feed the trolls, but I couldn't take it anymore. My apologies.

brown rowergirl said...

Yes! Yes! More nasty people! I LOVE it!

Since "bitter housewife" and "jerkface" have already been spoken for, I think I'll go for jealous assface. Seriously, though, "airhead"? That's the best you got?

Our dear Hannie has a lot of unpopular traits (she'll be the first to tell you that), but a head full of air ain't one of 'em.

Stick to the "man legs" comments. Those crack me up the hardest.

Anonymous said...

Of course, OF COURSE, of all the things you posted, I like the coat and clutch best -- i.e. the 2 most expensive! How does this always happen?

okay, I just realized that dress was the most expensive, but dresses over $1K don't even really register in my head as "real."

Anonymous said...

Not impressed @ 1:43pm

Welcome to the party that is ASJiNE; but, as an unvited guest, please refrain from "pissing" in the punchbowl ;-)

sarahsouth said...

y'all crack me up. please don't stop the comments.

ataraxia, the cashmere request is a great one!

also, i have another request for a topic - any tricks for perfecting one's judgment re: sizing for internet shopping? i mean, how often are you sending stuff back?

not impressed said...

How plum adorable of you to have your minions do your bidding for you.

C: uh, no

Meokat: you're as superficial as Johanna

anonymous no more: riiiight, "sad and pathetic." That's me in a nutshell. I think you and everyone else know I'm just saying what most of J's readers are thinking - the ones who don't have embarrassing girl crushes on her.

brown rowergirl: I hope the "brown" isn't in reference to your alma mater, because I'd expect more from an Ivy League girl than "assface." And she does have man legs, thanks for reminding me.

Dave said...

I suppose I have an embarrassing girl crush. It would be my first, 'cause I'm not a girl, but hey I can adjust.

Okay, so Johanna is a self-absorbed airhead. What's wrong with that? How does that harm anyone? Is it roughly the equivalent of being a pedofile? Apparently being a self-absorbed airhead gets a ton of readers who seem to enjoy Johanna's commentary. Which I thought was the whole point of writing a blog. Or is there some other criteria that I'm not aware of?

To a writer, love and hate are equally welcome as long as the reader is stimulated and keeps coming back. It's those that don't care that we regret, but then they actually leave after reading once.

etcetera said...

ooooh YES!! let's have an educational pedigree pissing contest! those are my favorite!

Johanna said...

"Okay, so Johanna is a self-absorbed airhead. What's wrong with that?"

Whoah, whoah, whoah! Dave, friend and fellow writer, where did this come from?

All to make a point, right?

Just checking...

denver fan said...

Just because a woman loves clothes and has strong opinions does not make her a self-absorbed airhead. She just says aloud what a lot of us think in our heads. I love this blog and encourage all those who don't to find another source of entertainment more suited to their tastes.

Dave said...

If someone thinks you are, who am I to argue?;-)

Seriously, it appears that not impressed believes you are and my big answer is so what? He/she/both (I don't want to assume) has been here a while. So clearly he's drawn to a self-absorbed airhead. Captivated. He reads the blog regularly and finds your life sad and empty. As if he knows you. If your life is sad and empty, then what kind of life does someone who has nothing better to do than read a blog they seem to despise have?

C said...

Oh no, Not Impressed. You're confused. I think you're laughable all on my own.

Anonymous said...


You would have a more scathing effect if you unloaded on "not impressed" with the same kind of philosophical" gravitas a "Dave."