26 April 2007

Like a cast-off mistress, I just can't stay away

As well-intentioned as my self-imposed break started out, I've realized in our first 10 hours of ripped-apart separation just how incomplete I am without you. I love you. I really really love you. And we could be together, we could, if we just worked hard enough at it. If we just looked at the good, just celebrated the effortless every-level chemistry, if we just took a time-out and focused on...on the love. The love.

So yeah, in addition to all that, I also felt selfish for not sharing with y'all (see, it's already coming back...) clips of the best training montage and kick-ass fights from a time not so long ago -- a time when action movies really mattered. A time before Seagal went all bloated earth-shaman on us, a time before we realized Swayze was a primordial dwarf, and a time before films in this genre suddenly became beholden to the same highbrow standards - i.e. logical plotlines, plausible hero-to-enemy kill ratios and scores not built around synthesizer solos - as dramas and foreign comedies.

Yes, I'm talking about the '80s, a decade when Rocky IV, Bloodsport, and Commando may not have been as critically acclaimed as Terms of Endearment, The Accidental Tourist, or Sophie's Choice, but at least they were mindless fun, at least they were motivating before big sports events, and at least they gave us great scenes like these below.

Enjoy. I already did - all three in their entirety plus Cobra - on my couch in head-to-toe sweats.

Rocky IV -- the training montage that set the standard:

Bloodsport -- the Chong Li fight:

Commando -- the infamous island mowdown:


west coast devotee said...

Wait a minute...a chick who likes Commando? Who *really* likes Commando? I didn't think it possible, but you just got even more perfect.

Fuck the race, come out to L.A. this weekend and marry me.

nyc admirer said...

I remember when you introduced me to the intoxicating screen presence of the pec-tacular Chong Li. I was never the same.

And, strangely enough, ever since, I've asked every girlfriend if she liked that movie and was as taken with that final fight as you were.

In 10 years, not a single one had even *seen* Bloodsport, much less know who Chong Li was.

You're one of a kind, doll...