30 March 2007

Stiletto-ready short shorts

Though I pray this never happens, I fear the important someone in the fashion world whose job it is to point at trends and say, "yes," "no," and "only on Chloë Sevigny," is going to wake up one morning in the near future and realize she was wrong to have moved the dressy-short-shorts-and-heels look from the slutty pile to the sophisticated pile.

Because I know you're as fully invested in this trend as I am, I thought it was about time I provided for you a selection of dressy short shorts appropriate not so much for the office, dinner with your friend's parents or a Sunday brunch, but definitely for that Georgetown townhouse party where you know your former beau's new girlfriend (or current wife) will be in attendance.

I personally like wearing my short shorts and heels with a half-preppy, half-"awww, how cute" top like this button-up 'Little Nell' blouse with Mandarin collar, low slung side-sash and pouf cap-sleeves ($78 at anthropologie.com). And in terms of venue, I prefer to sashay this look among older crowds that still aren't privy to last spring's fashion memo that declared shorts-n-heels no longer limited to prostitutes and high-school skanks on their way to becoming prostitutes.

Older men feel like they're looking at something naughty, which in DC translates to an entire evening of "I'd love to get together for lunch sometime and pick your brain about, um...you know, China stuff" conversations.

Older women flat-out just want to kick your ass. The thing is, though, if you're bold enough to rock short shorts and they're in their predictable, full-coverage Eileen Fisher henley dress, they probably kinda sorta can't. And even if there was one who could take you out cleanly, it'd still be worth it -- you can't ever really be on top, after all, without agreeing to a title-fight.

And on that note, enjoy my favorite denim-and-khaki-free picks for this spring's best stiletto-ready dressy short shorts:

Top to bottom:
1. To the lighthouse shorts by Elevenses ($68 at anthropologie.com)
2. Pleated short by Adam + Eve ($265 at shopbop.com)
3. Loyola tweed short by Paul & Joe ($282 at shopbop.com)
4. Pleat front shorts by L.A.M.B. ($145 at shopbop.com)*
5. Shiny banded-cuff shorts ($68 at ardenb.com)
6. Silk shortalls by Twelfth Street ($252 at nordstrom.com)*
7. Polka dot shorts by Johnson ($253 at dazsign.com)
8. High waisted button shorts (£20 at topshop.com)
9. Stretch sateen shorts by James Coviello ($375 at saks.com)
10. Phoebe shorts ($19.80 at forever21.com)
11. Hammish shorts by Theory ($130 at scoopnyc.com)
12. Striped shorts by Joe’s Jeans ($152 at pinkmascara.com)

*your editrix's top picks


dc girl said...

I still think the shorts and heels look is pretty slutty. Sorry!

brown rowergirl said...

Those navy/white polka dots shorts are TO DIE FOR! I love them so much. Unfortunately, I don't have $253 in the budget for a vacation, much less a pair of shorts.

Anónimo No Mas said...

I am pretty opposed to shorts and heels as well, because I think it is too hard to pull off without looking like a desperate housewife or a hussy.

Where does one wear a look like this? Jo, where have you worn this combination?

Lacy boyshorts and heels in the bedroom is as far as I can take this trend.

Johanna said...

DC girl/Anónimo No Mas:

Shorts-and-heels isn't slutty when it's done right! I do, however, agree with you, C, that it has the potential to look a little desperate housewife-ish, but you know, that *is* part of my look.

I wore dressy shorts and heels quite a bit last spring and summer - ask L or T. I wore them to my favorite NYC bar, Library (in the Hudson Hotel) to meet my gentleman friend, I wore them to the one and only time I've ever indulged in an Adams Morgan night, and I wore them more than a few times for late (i.e. time to go home and change after work) happy hours at places like Spezie, Vidalia, and even the Mayflower.

The trick is to wear a pair of blousy short shorts. No matter how thin your stems are, you can't do short AND tight, or else you'll look like a streetwalker. And on top of that, you need to wear a fairly conservative top. By wearing short shorts, you've decided to showcase your legs, so be a lady and cover the rest up. I would never go sleeveless or tight up top with this look. I'm sure there are exceptions, depending on the venue and occasion, but as a general rule, I'd err on the side of simple and covered up above the waist.

Also, I like my overall shorts-n-heels look to be preppy sexy, not vampy sexy. Tweeds or muted plaids mixed with burgundy croc-embossed platform heels, for example. The satin/metallic shorts are a bit riskier, and frankly, not really DC-appropriate. If you want to indulge in those, you'd better hike yourself up to Manhattan.

Try it out, ladies!

bff in chicago said...

I'm on board, babe! I love this look, but right now at least, my legs are in no shape to be this exposed. Maybe by May...

jessica said...

Those pearlized white shorts would look darling with red pumps and a fitted black oxford with short sleeves.

And a tan, of course!

Anónimo No Mas said...

I knew I could count on you for a solid explanation, thanks.

I will examine you in this look in action at Spezie when I return.