29 March 2007

That of which I am most proud

The 500th post.

As painstakingly difficult as self-congratulation is for me, I can't help but share with you the wee bit of pride I'm feeling upon reaching this milestone. Granted, embedded in the accomplishment of writing 500 posts in just over 3 months is the admission I have little or no social life, but even so, it feels pretty 'effing good, and you should at the very least give me golf claps for continually ripping apart - and occasionally building back up - the unfortunate looking women on and around the ConnAve/M Street intersection.

As I was deciding how best to celebrate number 500, I started thinking about the vast spectrum of all that which I have earned, stolen and been unfairly given based on my looks over the past 27 years. Where does this blog rank among these?

After much thought and a close call among learning Chinese, going without food or water while enduring two-a-day crew practices for three straight seasons and that which ended up at number five, here for you all is a peek into your editrix's self-absorbed soul:

Proudest achievement #5: Vidalia on M Street. That's really all I want to say about it.

Proudest achievement #4: My 200+ collection of purchased-in-China action movies. I have every Van Damme, Seagal, Stallone, Snipes, Schwarzenegger, Willis and Lundgren movie ever made. Even the rare straight-to-DVD ones like The Last Patrol and Today You Die. And the best part is, if I ever want to watch any of them with Chinese voice-overs, Thai subtitles or Chinese voice-overs with Thai subtitles, that fantasy is only a menu click away.

Proudest achievement #3: This blog. It was close between achievements three and four -- the blog only beat out my action movie collection by an Olsen twin.

Proudest achievement #2: My legs. I've only recently realized the now obvious connection between my love for my legs and my unusual - so it's been described - habit of going entire seasons without wearing pants. Some women hold dear their kindheartedness, some relish in their ability to whip up a dinner party four-course, and others would probably cite their critical analysis or conflict mediation skills. That's fine. For them. But I happen to love my runner's calves, my gave-up-Haribo-gummis-for-these thighs and the insanely high arches in my feet that afford me hours and hours of painless 4-inch heel-prancing. Yes, prancing. Just the way I was born, haters.

Proudest achievement #1: Well, duh. You saw this coming. I'm not sure exactly how Montesquieu qualifies as an achievement, but since the day that 2 lb dollop of jasmine-conditioned wonderful was given to me, I made a promise to place him at the top of every list I made.


new fan said...

Congratulations to you on your 500th posting!

And congratulations to us for the picture of your legs!

dc in denver said...

your blog is fantastic! I assume you know it's linked to today on dcblogs.com? I'm so glad it was, or I never would have found it!

AnĂ³nimo No Mas said...

Congratulations Jo!

On your hot legs, your great blog, your wicked ambition, your cute pup, and your excellent taste in friends!

Keep looking great and doing good work!

Anonymous said...

that is the cutest dog I have ever seen.

Anonymous said...

The blog is a fantastic achievement and you should be very proud of it. Like the song said, nobody does it better. Here's to another 500.

But for god's sake, let Monte be a boy sometimes. Jasmine scented? Good God.


erin said...

OMG I love your blog! I just favorited it and can't wait to start catching up on all the archives tonight after work.

nyc admirer said...

Your action movie collection and the picture of your legs (both how gorgeous they are AND that you would post a photo of them on your blog) is in a nutshell why I'll never get over you.

Congrats, doll, on the first 500.

I'd celebrate by getting you a flute of whatever at Stone Rose, but alas, you're there and I'm here...

Anonymous said...

I don't know your dog (or you), but your legs have to be the bigger achievement of the two.

nyc admirer said...

Wait a minute, it just hit me - is that white dress in the picture that ruffly collared one you wore last time we saw each other in NYC? At Stone Rose? God, that was some dress. I remember all the girls being so jealous (including our blonde waitress who brought you the wrong drink twice!) and all the middle-aged men's jaws on the floor. That was a good happy hour.

i think you're brilliant said...

I'm so proud of you!

I'm also not surprised one iota that you've written 500 posts in 3 months. Honey, you've been practicing bitchy judgment your whole life - who better to put it all down in written word for the world to see and enjoy?

adore you,

Jacob Da Jew said...

Found your via "Next Blog" Button.

Congrats on 500th post. I'm only up to 95. How do you do it??

Nice legs. I'm proud of my legs too, as I am a cyclist. But um..I don't think you would want to see them in high heels. LOL.

Your job most definitely sounds interesting but I like how you don't let it take over your life.

I'm gonna add you to my blog roll.



Anonymous said...

"As painstakingly difficult as self-congratulation is for me"
That's funny...

knew you as hannie, too said...

Is it wrong that I bookmarked this post just so I could look at your legs again? As inspiration (I'm a girl), of course ;-)

Congratulations on 500! Er, I guess it's like 505 by now, isn't it? You're insane!

Anonymous said...

Best.Legs. Ever.

And you cook, too? At Vidalia?

Johanna said...

Uh yeah, cook, that's what I did at Vidalia. Cook.