25 January 2007

I tried not to be impressed

But when I saw a woman step out of a tinted-windowed, Diplomatic-plated black Mercedes S550 in front of Burberry this morning, I had to catch my breath.

It wasn't the car, it wasn't her perfect blowout, her impeccably kohled eyes, her black Christian Louboutian almond-toed knee-high stiletto boots, or even her Starburst-size diamond right hand ring that paralyzed me.

It was her handbag. Her black alligator Hermes Birkin bag, to be specific.

The light turned green, but I let the seconds tick down as I stood on the corner of ConnAve and M street calculating in my head how many months of rent money were hanging over her arm. My estimation of six, after consulting Sotheby's website, would have been spot-on if she had had the pebbled leather version. Her bag, however, the alligator bag, is not only much more difficult to acquire (FYI: the non-alligator styles have two-year-plus wait lists), but it is also the most expensive of all Hermes' handbags and runs between $28,000 and $31,500.

Like I said, I tried not to be impressed, I really did, but in my world, seeing that bag in person is as awe-inspiring and flat-out shocking as I imagine listening to Britney give a pointed, articulate talk on Sino-U.S. relations would be.

On the bright side, the woman was as homely as an Oklahoma prairie dog.


Anonymous said...

You're much better off having the pretty face than the $30K handbag :-)

Johanna said...

How sweet! Thank you.

You're right about money not being the most important part of life. I tend to forget that when trolling the 'Net for "If I had a Sugar Daddy" items. All I have to do to remind myself of that is to think of Tori Spelling, the poster child for the saying, "all the money in the world can't fix a broke face."

That's assuming a bitchy comment I coined during my sophomore year in high school actually counts as a "saying."

Keep reading!