14 February 2007

My new favorite couple


No single girl is ever really happy when she loses one of her fellow single friends to coupledom. Even if she genuinely likes the person with whom her friend is entering into the relationship, it doesn't matter, because the end result is always the same.

Gone are the Thursday nights when the two of you settle in for Tivo-d episodes from MTV's Monday and Wednesday night lineups while eating Domino's thin-crust and sour gummi bears.

Gone are the let's-meet-at-Zara-in-Georgetown-in-20 text messages that make your Sunday afternoons worth leaving your apartment for.

Gone are the planned-months-in-advance dates to movies no one but the two of you wanted to see.

And perhaps most disappointing, gone is the knowledge that the birthday present you so carefully picked out for her at her favorite vintage store will be her favorite.

You can imagine, then, the tremble in my hand when L called me today to tell me she stayed home "to welcome" her Valentine.

"Your Valentine?" I asked, confused.

"Uh-huh. He should arrive sometime today. I'm SO excited. He's SO gorgeous. You are SO going to love him."

"Your Valentine?" I repeated, my confusion now bordering on fear.

Before I could inquire further, I heard a shriek not unlike the one I made in response to Katie and Hubbell's falling-in-love montage in "The Way We Were" earlier this evening.

The next thing I know, about four minutes later, I hear, "He's here! He's here! OH MY GOD, it's beee-you-teeful."

"It's?"

"Oh, hey, yeah, sorry for dropping the phone. I had to go downstairs. My new bag is finally here! OH MY GOD, I just saw the lining. It's cream-colored silk with a gold diamond print, and oh, Johanna, it's...I can't even, I just can't, I can't begin to describe this feeling. This is the best Valentine's Day ever."

"Your Valentine is a handbag?" I asked.

"Well, yeah. And I don't mean to be rude, but I have to go to now. We're gonna take a nap together."

For the first time in my life, I'm sincerely looking forward to sharing my couch and my precious weekly 30-minute "Maui Fever" screenings not just with my best girlfriend but with her new conquest as well.

I just hope he'll let me have a peek at his devastatingly luxurious lining.

2 comments:

Monte's Mistress said...

Let's get one thing straight--the yellow vintage clutch will ALWAYS be a favorite. As Beyonce said, "It's irreplaceable...", just like the girl who picked it out.

Johanna said...

Aww, thanks. And just because I know we're both girl-crushing hard on Chaunte, I kept this week's "Maui Fever" episode in my Tivo log.

You don't catch the nuances in the first go-around, obviously, so I propose a second screening at some point when you get back from NYC.

Give the city a big giant kiss for me!