04 February 2007

"Don't tell me about lip-care."

A grown man once said that to me, completely serious, in response to my telling him he should have a swipe of my Kiehl's Lip Balm. That exchange will forever stand as one of the most ridiculous of my life.

And for the record, he did need me to tell him about lip-care. Those plush puppies were as dry as Britney's Duane-Chapman-looking weave.

Inspired by my visceral reactions to the commercial clipped below, I'm going to risk eliciting more defensive comments and recommend to you my and my girlfriends' favorite lip-moisturizing products.

First, let's be reminded of what it looks like when two people totally in love kiss on a sunny spring day in the middle of a corn field or rain forest or wherever the hell they are. I looked it up online (because I'm like that), and this couple really is together. Rembrandt only interviewed couples to ensure the authenticity of their chemistry. Their plan worked so well that, for some of you, this might just ruin your day. Present company included.

L wanted me to remind you that on your second or perhaps third viewing, take note of the woman's "perfectly applied bronzer."


To keep your lips this kissable, try one of the following:

1. Lip Balm SPF 15 in clear/tinted by Kiehl's ($8.50 at kiehls.com)
2. Beeswax Lip Balm by Burt's Bees ($3 at burtsbees.com)
3. Sugar Lip Balm by fresh ($22.50 at sephora.com)
4. Minted Rose Lip Salve by Smith's ($5.50 at amazon.com)
5. Peppermint Lip Balm by Whole Foods ($2.99 at WF everywhere)
6. Kiss Me by Philosophy ($10 at philosophy.com)
7. Lip Care Stick by Dr. Hauschka ($12.95 at drhauschka.com)
8. Superbalm Tinted Lip Treatment ($11.50 at clinique.com)
9. Emulsion Lip Exfoliant by Smashbox ($18 at sephora.com)
10. Lipscription Exfoliating Balm by benefit ($30 at benefit.com)


Anonymous said...

that dude looks like Angelina's brother.

nyc admirer said...

I LOVE that commercial, but the only people who kiss like that are the ones still in their first year of dating.

And like, the one couple we can think of who have been married for 50 years.

Chase the dream, doll!

Anonymous said...

Whatever happened to plain ol' Chapstick?

Johanna said...

If you want your lips to be so-so, keep using Chapstick.

If you want them lusciously soft and able to withstand hours and hours of Rembrandt-commercial-type kissing, try a balm or a salve, instead. It makes a big difference. Trust me.

a fan said...

this "grown man" who got defensive over your suggestion, what did he use on his lips that was so special he couldn't use your Kiehl's?

I'd have taken you up on your offer...

Johanna said...

I don't know what he used, but I'm pretty sure it was scent-free, color-free, chemical-free, and free of anything else that makes life interesting.

Carmex, maybe?